20 days and I have already learned so much. 20 days, and I have a changed mindset. 20 days, and I am ready to make this, the best year of my life.

In my 21 years of living in this world, I have realized that rejection besides the fear of failure, the one thing is that keeps people from achieving their dreams. Rejection can be defined as the action of rejecting, or the act of being rejected. The rejection, I am talking about in this post refers to the latter; the act of being rejected. I think many people often confuse rejection with failure. However, the two are very distinct. Because you see, rejection is no failure. Failure is giving up. Whereas everyone gets rejected, and it is how you handle rejection that determines where you will end up.

Personally, I have never been good at dealing with rejection, and it is now that I realize that. I have come to the realization that moving to the Netherlands has impacted my life in many ways, and not all positive. When I was living in Africa many years ago, I never had to fear rejection. I was always accepted the way I was, and I was an openminded, smart and joyful child. When I moved to the Netherlands, I changed in so many ways. I became a person different from the one I was in Africa, often as the only black child in class, I felt that I had to adapt myself to the rest. I had to change and behave as was expected from me. I lost the openness I had when living in Africa, and became afraid of speaking out. As curious as I was and am, I became afraid of asking, not because I was afraid of the answer, rather the feeling of rejection. And thus, I kept my mouth shut. I always had something to say, but I never said it. And today I can assure you, that there is no greater agony than having to bear untold stories inside you.

If there is one thing I know for sure, then it is that when people are truly determined, they can overcome anything. For this year I decided that I wanted to become the person I know, I was meant to be. The person that is not afraid of speaking out, the one that knows that she doesn’t have to change herself to be accepted. The one, that knows that she should not live for people’s acceptance, that she can do whatever the hell she wants, and that no one, and no rejection can keep her from achieving her dreams. Basically, I wanted to become myself, and in my attempt of doing so I got inspired and came to understand that rejection does not mean that one is not good enough, but that others just failed to notice you. Also, I have come to understand that it is okay to fear. Sometimes it is okay to be rejected, however, it is never okay to change the person you are. just because you want to fit in. Because you think you have to, because really; you don’t. One should always strive to be or become their truest selves. Never, let no one convince you otherwise, and know that it is by being yourself that you really can make a change in your life and, in the world. You can not live a happy life when you are busy living one that is based on others approval or disapproval of yours.  You must understand that just because you are different does not mean that you will be rejected. You being different in any way, is what makes you unique. It is the beauty within you.

I am sharing this because maybe, just like me there might be some people who are or have struggled with the fear of rejection or something else. I wish for all to know that we can overcome our fears, that we can become the person we dream of becoming. We just must have the courage of identifying, understanding and eventually facing our fears. And in doing so I want to advise you not compare yourself with anyone, instead, compete with yourself and try to become excellent at whatever you are doing. Be it overcoming your fears, being more successful in life or whatever you are after. I know you can; because I am going to face my fears and become the person I am meant to be. I am not going to bear the agony of not speaking out anymore. And if I can do that, then you most certainly also can.

Let this be our best year.


PS. do not hesitate to share your thoughts with me, in the comments or via mail 🙂

goodbye 2018

Hey guys, to start with I hope you are all doing fine, and ready for the new year that’s to come. I know that I haven’t been able to post a lot lately and, I think it’s very unfortunate. However, I have hope that 2019 is going to be the year of consistency and many blog posts.

While sitting in my apartment with friends and family, I wanted to take the opportunity to reflect on the amazing year that was 2018. For me personally, 2018 was a year of great opportunities and amazing encounters. It is the year in which I finally got the chance to go back to Guinea, after 11 years and, it was a dream coming true. I will never forget, the feeling of joy I experienced once I got out of the airplane and when I finally got to meet my family members and old friends. It was just magical.

Also, during this year I had the opportunity to travel with friends, I went to London and Barcelona and had an unforgettable time. Moreover, I received my first-year diploma, which I really wanted and by doing so accomplished one of my resolutions for the year 2018. 2018 was an insightful year, a year of rekindling old friendships and making new ones, finding love and letting it go. It was a year of finding new passions and developing old ones.

In 2018 I once again got the opportunity to be in service to others. On my 21st birthday, I decided to start doing an action for the organization War Child, to help children in war get an education, psycho-social help, and the opportunity be a child. I was committed to raise 500 euros by August 2019 and, it’s with great joy that I can say that I have raised 266.50 euros so far. I haven’t done this alone, I had a great team of volunteers helping me and it felt so good doing something for the good cause. Knowing that the little effort I have made will benefit one child, somewhere in the world in a way I can’t even imagine. I hope that in 2019 I will be able to raise the rest of the money I aimed for.

Another important decision that I made this year was to start wearing the turban hijab. Since September 2018 I stopped doing braids, I went natural and decided not to show my hair anymore. This was a religiously inspired choice, and I am happy that I have been able to stay consistent. Even though, some days I found myself contemplating about doing my hair again. I think the reason I continued wearing the turban is that deep down I knew that it was and is, the right thing to do for me at this moment. I don’t know what the future holds, but I have hope to continue on this path I have chosen.

In less than 5 hours 2019 will make its entrance, and this year will be nothing more but a recollection. For 2019 I have written down some resolutions. Among them is that I want to me blogging more; at least twice a month. Also, I want to read more books and improve my communication skills. I hope I will be able to achieve all that I want in 2019 and, hope that all of you will achieve all your dreams.

If there is one thing that I can take away from 2018, then it is that: if one is truly committed to something, there will always be a way to do it. Desire and consistency is all you need to achieve whatever you want. And sometimes one just needs to act as if they know what they are doing because it is through confidence that one can develop competence.

With that been said I want to thank all who have taken their time this year, to read my blog post and wish you all the best in 2019. May it be the best of years.

Peace be upon you all,


Why Guinea needs a democratic rule

In my last blog post I already shared this, but sometimes one can better express the way they feel or think by speaking. Thus a video, in which I share my thoughts about Guinea. I have the firm belief that democracy, correct leadership and unity is the only thing that can help safe, this country and its people. As you will hear in the video I have hope in the future of the country, I indeed have hope that one day, one person with good intentions might be able to help make the changes needed in order for this country to flourish.

Many Guineans across the world are starting to open their eyes and understand that the time for change has come. Though little action has been taken to make that change, I think that awareness is the first step needed for achieving anything.

For too long Guinea and Africa at large have been governed by old men, ancient mindsets and corrupt ideologies, who were only concerned with their own enrichment. Which has done no good to  Guinea or Africa, I think young people should step up take back the power to govern…

Listen to the speech and do not hesitate to share your thoughts with me in the comments 🙂

101 killings and Alpha condé: Guinea has reached the heart of despair

101 deaths, that is more than enough. I will not be silent in the face injustice, and thus I will speak. The loss of a loved one is probably the worst kind of pain that exists. It hurts when one dies naturally, let alone when young people with promising futures, are robbed from their lives. I strongly believe, that undignified is the one who reaches to violence in order to enforce his ideas. Worthless, are they and worthless is he. No one, absolutely no one in this world, has the right to rob a fellow human being from their lives.

Following this week’s news on what is happening in Guinea, a country that I for many reasons hold dear awakened something in me. Since 2011, 101 innocent civilians were murdered, mostly at the hands of those who were supposed to protect them. These killings happened during periods of what should have been peaceful demonstrations. Unfortunately, it appears that the concept of peaceful demonstration is not yet clear in Guinea. Many of the people who were murdered belonged to a certain ethnicity, and besides that many of them were killed while following their normal, day to day duties. They were not present during any demonstration, yet they got killed by a bullet. The government is not doing anything to punish those criminals, but then again, how can they? If they are actually the ones behind the killings. If money and power is all they care about and would do anything to keep it, even killing their own people.

The situation in Guinea right now is really bad, and that is unfortunate. It bothers me that innocent people are being killed and that there is no such thing as law and order. The fact that the rule of law is not being respected (if it even exists), is going to be the country’s downfall. And again, innocent civilians will suffer the consequences.  Of course, that is a prediction from my part, but I am sure that if no change is made there will be no future for the country.

One week after Guinea celebrated its 60th anniversary of independence, I wrote a speech for one of my courses. I never meant to share it here on the blog, but with what has happened in the country recently, I think it can do no harm to share some of my thoughts. The speech is about the implementation of a more democratic rule in Guinea. by reading it, you find that I am against the current leader and that I support the idea of a more united and democratic Guinea.

Please read it, there is a lesson in it for everyone, Guinean or not. And please feel free to comment and share your thoughts with me. I always love to read about other’s views.

Implementation of a democratic rule Guinee

I am thankful for joining you today. The day that will go down in history, as the commencement of the liberation of our country.

This week exactly 60 years ago, a great nation of fearless people fought for the liberation of our nation. 60 years ago, they envisioned for us their legacy, a powerful and united nation.

But 60 years later, our nation, our country, and our Guinee, is still not united. 60 years later our nation is more dived than ever before. 60 years later, our nation despite being rich in natural resources, is among the poorest countries in the world.  After 60 years of liberation from colonial powers, our nation has failed those who risked their lives and fought for our independence. So, I am here today to remind you of our country’s shameful condition.

It is shameful to acknowledge, but since its independence, Guinee has had only 4 presidents. And more shameful to acknowledge, is the fact that only 1 of those presidents was elected democratically.

Upon his election in 2010, before being elected as the president of the Republic of Guinee, our dear president promised his citizens that he would strengthen Guinee as a democracy, and end corruption.  However, instead of honoring the promise he made to his people, our nation, our country, he showed his true colors once in office. The first action our ‘oh so beloved president’ took once in office, was to extend the presidential term.

8 years later, and our country has not made any improvements. 8 years later, and the country’s infrastructure has worsened, in fact, bridges that were constructed during colonial ruling, are falling apart, causing deaths to our citizens and hampering locals to travel.  After 8 years of ruling our country’s economy has not improved, our educational system is not functioning. Dear people after years of president Alpha Condé, all we have, is what he promised us he would eradicate, corruption.

Dear compatriots, are you as Guineans not ashamed of our country’s condition?  Ashamed of what we have become, and what we might be, if we as a people don’t decide to step up against the political injustices of this country, and fight for a better future, a brighter future a future of hope and unity? Because if we do not make a radical change in our political system, there will be no future for our children, our grandchildren and those to come after them.  And we, we alone will be the ones responsible for condemning the future of our own people.   

But my dear compatriots, I have hope in the future of our country. I have hope that you could become the heroes of our nation. The ones willing to fight for justice and equality. Be the fathers and the founders of a democratic Guinee. Be the change that shakes the foundations of our beautiful country, the change that will lead to the constitution and the liberation of our nation and our Guinee. We as a people and a country need the implementation of a democratic rule.

For our nation to thrive we need to hold our political leaders accountable for their actions. For our nation to be liberated, we need to limit the power of our president to no more than two elected terms. For our nation to function correctly, we need to limit the serving terms of our congressmen. For our country to be the legacy we leave behind for our children, we must have just congressmen, we must have just leaders, elected by the people, for the people to serve this great nation we call home. Dear compatriots, you are our country’s future, the destiny of our nation is in your hands. 

From Different Hairstyles a Year to The Turban: The Challenge of Covering my Hair

It is different, it is hot, it takes practice, it is a challenge and it is my choice.

Born a Muslima, and first growing up in a multi-diverse Muslim environment, where most young Muslim women were not concerned with wearing the hijab, and almost only elderly- and or middle-aged woman who had gone to Mecca wore it, I never would have imagined that at age 21, I would make the definitive choice of wearing the headscarf. Especially not since at a very young age I moved to the Netherlands, a country where only a handful of Muslim women wear the headscarf.

Me choosing to wear the headscarf, hijab, turban or whatever you name it, might surprise many people in my environment. Because I am that girl, that used to have more than 10 different hairstyles a year. My hair was my everything, I loved to experience with new styles. One day it is braids and the next day it is an afro, and before you know it is straightened, then it is curled, then long, short, different. It was always different, for every occasion I had a different hairstyle. Though it always took a lot of time to do my hair, I enjoyed every moment of the process. And the outcome even more.

So, you might wonder, why? Why in world would I decide to cover my hair? The answer to that question to me is very simple. I have always felt a strong admiration towards young Muslim girls who wear the hijab. And I truly love the way it looks on some people, also I always knew that at some stage of my life I would love to wear the hijab. As a Muslima, I feel like it is kind of my duty to be wearing the headscarf, and really, I love the idea behind it, to me, it is all about modesty.

The first time wearing the headscarf crossed my mind a few years ago. When I started learning more about my religion, and because of one of my best friends, who used to cover her hair.  At the time, I was really motivated and wanted to wear the hijab, outside the mosque or praying room. So that is what I did. Unfortunately, that idea was not really appreciated by my family and close friends. All told me, that I was too young to be wearing a headscarf, that it made me look older, and that wearing it would impact my future negatively. Honestly, I was devasted by people’s opinions on whether I should wear the hijab or not. At school and work, my classmates and colleagues were surprised to see me with a hijab. Many told me that they didn’t know that I was Muslim and that they thought that I was Christian. Honestly, that hurt. Some did like my new look but most preferred the looks I had before the hijab. Once I was asked if I was being forced to wear it, and obviously, that was not the case, it was more the opposite. I could have handled strangers thinking the hijab was not fit for me, but my family not supporting me in my choice was too much for me, at the time. So, after two weeks of critiques, I took off the hijab and did what I always used to do with my hair. People loved it, but in the beginning, I was disappointed. But, since this was what I used to do, I eventually loved it. So, I wore the hijab only during Ramadan, I was okay with that because in my heart I knew that one day I would be strong enough to wear the hijab.

For two months now, I have been wearing the turban hijab, that is the one that only covers the hair. I love it, and I have learned so many styles and keep learning. I have bought many scarfs and the people in my environment, in The Hague are supportive. I live alone, so I do not have to cope with my family’s critiques and even so, I have told them that I will be wearing the turban and that it is my choice. It’s my life and I am old enough to decide how I want to live it. And if it’s by covering my hair, then so be it.

Right now, my only concern is whether I will be able to continue wearing the turban. Because sometimes it is really tempting to fall back into old habits. And besides that, I also feel that I have to change, and or adapt my clothing style. Because to me, it is controversial to wear a turban and a short dress, just to name an example. I love my dresses, I love the way I dress, and honestly, it’s going to be hard giving up on that. However, I need to think on how I can make my dress code fit with this new path I have chosen. It will not be easy, I will not be the most modest Muslima, I will struggle, I might fall, but no matter what, I will stand up again and work hard to achieve what I want. Little by little I will make it work. The first step is already made, consistency is now all I need.

I truly believe that every single woman, Muslim or not, should have the right and the freedom to decide for themselves whether to cover their hair or not without being afraid of other’s opinions. All should do what they feel comfortable with. Looking back, a few years ago I might not have been read for hijab or turban, now I can feel the difference, I am ready to take on this challenge of covering my hair, and I’m looking forward to seeing where it will bring me.

*please do not hesitate on sharing your thoughts in the comments below. I would love to read it!

peace be upon you all!           Snapchat-385157581